Tuesday, August 09, 2005
Guys vs. Girls
The male and female specimens of the homo-sapien species of mammal are very different animals. Don't let these equal opportunity squawkers persuade you otherwise. This is not an all-inclusive essay on the differences between men and women, it's just a few things that make me laugh because they are so true in most cases.
Take conversations, for example. The very fundamental approach to conversations are different. Girls will have entire conversations in which everything that has been talked about is about each other / a mutual acquaintance. They throw around lots of "you"s and "we"s. It's a very communal exchange. By talking almost entirely about the person that you are talking to, girls somehow feel closer to one another, or something. Not being a girl I don't understand exactly why they do it that way.
On the other hand, go listen to a conversation between guys. Everything that is talked about is directly related to the speaker. Lots of "I"s and "my"s. I remember when I... or maybe My friend just tried that. Girls look at this from the outside and think, sheez, how conceited and inward-concentrated! Look harder. Guys relate to one another by opening up their own experiences to one another. I'm not saying that all guys and girls talk that way, but it's so common that it should be a stereotype if it's not already. I also don't think that either way is necessarily better than the other.
I was going to make about 30 other points, but maybe I can save those for some future post about guys vs. girls. Instead I'll put up a short list of "Guy Rules" that I found on another blog a few minutes ago:
Take conversations, for example. The very fundamental approach to conversations are different. Girls will have entire conversations in which everything that has been talked about is about each other / a mutual acquaintance. They throw around lots of "you"s and "we"s. It's a very communal exchange. By talking almost entirely about the person that you are talking to, girls somehow feel closer to one another, or something. Not being a girl I don't understand exactly why they do it that way.
On the other hand, go listen to a conversation between guys. Everything that is talked about is directly related to the speaker. Lots of "I"s and "my"s. I remember when I... or maybe My friend just tried that. Girls look at this from the outside and think, sheez, how conceited and inward-concentrated! Look harder. Guys relate to one another by opening up their own experiences to one another. I'm not saying that all guys and girls talk that way, but it's so common that it should be a stereotype if it's not already. I also don't think that either way is necessarily better than the other.
I was going to make about 30 other points, but maybe I can save those for some future post about guys vs. girls. Instead I'll put up a short list of "Guy Rules" that I found on another blog a few minutes ago:
- Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
- Crying is blackmail.
- If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
- If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
- A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
Comments:
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I did not even read your blog entry yet Jason - I just wanted to be the first comment in what will be a long list of comments.
# posted by 
: August 09, 2005 9:05 AM
: August 09, 2005 9:05 AM
Jason you need to be more sensitive! danit terry! I wanted to be first!
# posted by : August 09, 2005 9:08 AM
: August 09, 2005 9:08 AM
"danit" all to pieces! Ha, perfect example so far:
Terry: "I did not even blah blah blah"
Kelly: "Jason you blah blah blah" and "Terry blah blah blah".
See, I told you this is how it works!
Terry: "I did not even blah blah blah"
Kelly: "Jason you blah blah blah" and "Terry blah blah blah".
See, I told you this is how it works!
yeah most of my conversations revolve around me because I think that I have interesting life stories that I experience as I go on in my day to day life as me. I don't think that this makes me conceited b/c I would expect the same interesting life stories of others if they had interesting lives like me. Okay, I was just trying to have a comment that would me focused instead of other focused...i found it a very easy task...now I feel bad now that I know other people are going to think that I'm conceited and being female I have no excuse for this...but at least I don't gossip b/c I'm too busy talking about myself ;)
Holy Crap! Best. Show. Ever.
The Chimp Channel on TBS around 1999. Hilfrickinlarioius.
The Chimp Channel on TBS around 1999. Hilfrickinlarioius.
# posted by : August 09, 2005 11:00 AM
: August 09, 2005 11:00 AM
OMG! The best on Chimp Channel was when the monkeys dressed up like Braveheart and actually shot lightning bolts out of their arses. Soooo good!
Okay I don't really know how to show this video but I have it saved b/c it makes me laugh eveytime I see it.
Check it out:
http://www.agschools.com/humor/stinkymonkey%5B1%5D.mpeg
Check it out:
http://www.agschools.com/humor/stinkymonkey%5B1%5D.mpeg
First. Female. Ever. To like the Chimp Channel.
I'm impressed.
I'm impressed.
# posted by : August 09, 2005 12:46 PM
: August 09, 2005 12:46 PM
See, she talks about herself AND likes monkeys...I always knew something was wrong with her.
By the way, how did this men and women topic get turned into a monkey topic? This seems to happen every time.
By the way, how did this men and women topic get turned into a monkey topic? This seems to happen every time.
How come you posted this post this morning and I have checked your blog like 5 times today wondering when the king of blogging would post a new post, and now at 2 in the afternoon I can finally see it?? I am so annoyed.
Hey I think it is funny to watch monkeys..one time I was at the zoo when I was like 5 and there was a monkey on a swing and he was peeing and swinging at the same time, It was really funny.
Hey I think it is funny to watch monkeys..one time I was at the zoo when I was like 5 and there was a monkey on a swing and he was peeing and swinging at the same time, It was really funny.
Humping frogs, peeing monkeys. Yep, we've lost all sense of modesty.
# posted by : August 09, 2005 1:46 PM
: August 09, 2005 1:46 PM
Since we are on the monkey topic....
One of my worst nightmares as a kid involved monkeys fighting on Monkey Island at the Cleveland Zoo. The monkeys had swords and were fighting each other and all I can remember of the dream was a dead monkey floating around and around the island.
One of my worst nightmares as a kid involved monkeys fighting on Monkey Island at the Cleveland Zoo. The monkeys had swords and were fighting each other and all I can remember of the dream was a dead monkey floating around and around the island.
# posted by : August 09, 2005 2:04 PM
: August 09, 2005 2:04 PM
I, for one, do NOT think monkeys are cute... everytime I take the kids to the zoo the monkeys have nasty inflamed red butts.
And also, I tend to talk about myself and not the person I'm talking to. I do feel bad afterward like all I care about is me. But I think Kelmo is right - they have every right to talk about themselves, and it would be a breath of fresh air if someone thought their life was interesting enough to talk about. I like your philosophy on this one, Kelmo.
And also, I tend to talk about myself and not the person I'm talking to. I do feel bad afterward like all I care about is me. But I think Kelmo is right - they have every right to talk about themselves, and it would be a breath of fresh air if someone thought their life was interesting enough to talk about. I like your philosophy on this one, Kelmo.
Autumn...yes animals "enjoy" that, and it is actually a particular zoo employee's job to facilitate such, uh, enjoyment. However, monkeys, with their opposable thumbs and all, can take care of it themselves.
Now this kind of talk is just going nowhere kids. I draw the line. Let's not ruin the humor of monkeys by there occasional crude humor. We wouldn't want people to look at us b/c of the inappropiate behavior of another person...oh, god! The image...its stuck in my head. I can't...get it out....oh where's the good clean senseless humor of the chimp channel when you need it?
Who here would buy a Trunk Monkey if it was a commercially available "product"?
# posted by : August 10, 2005 7:34 AM
: August 10, 2005 7:34 AM
Trunk Monkey! Those are the best. I was using a beta release of Trunk Monkey for a while. Dang monkey never got the "patch" to stop him from smoking around the spare tank of gas I keep in the trunk. Hopefully they fix that problem before their final release of the trunk monkey product. Here is the link if you don't know what we're talking about.
"I had the bathroom from hell. [ laughs ] It was like every time I cleaned it, ten minutes later it was dirty again! Then I heard about Bathroom Monkey. They said the Bathroom Monkey system would keep my entire bathroom clean for up to eight whole months. They were right."
# posted by : August 10, 2005 1:55 PM
: August 10, 2005 1:55 PM
jason, we've gotta have another guys v. girls post some other time. this one, well, it didn't really spark the needed controversy. but given the bloggers we have here (being of both the male and female species) i think we could come up with some good content. not that i have any to start you off...
but anyway, if u have time, will u check my comment/question on aut's post. since you are a computer person and know everything about every aspect of computers, i thought i'd ask you. :)
but anyway, if u have time, will u check my comment/question on aut's post. since you are a computer person and know everything about every aspect of computers, i thought i'd ask you. :)
Since Jason and Kelly are on vacation now - we can comment on Jason's site all we want and don't have to worry about him responding.
The site gets enough traffic that we could start a new topic and go from there. Any suggestions?
The site gets enough traffic that we could start a new topic and go from there. Any suggestions?
# posted by : August 11, 2005 3:45 PM
: August 11, 2005 3:45 PM
Hey, this is Jason and Kelly FROM ON VACATION IN CHICAGO. We just stopped into an Apple store which has free internet. I caught all of you trying to hijack my comments thread! This store is about 5 minutes from our hotel, so I can check on all of you any time I want to!
No Jason, you are on your one year anniversary vacation with Kelly. If you check you blog while your supposed to be spending time with her and away from everything else...well then I hope she pinches your arm fat in response so you can learn to choose her over your blog site.
"Hey, this is Jason and Kelly FROM ON VACATION IN CHICAGO."
Hey, you can't use ON immediately after FROM.
Hehehe, arm fat. *pictures Jason eating four McDonald's fried fish sandwiches again...*
Hey, you can't use ON immediately after FROM.
Hehehe, arm fat. *pictures Jason eating four McDonald's fried fish sandwiches again...*
# posted by : August 11, 2005 7:07 PM
: August 11, 2005 7:07 PM
And why are we giving Jason the satisfaction of getting MORE comments on his blog whem he isn't even blogging! STOP NOW!
I can't stop commenting! With every challenge to stop it only gives me more things to say. Did you hear about the remaking of the He-man movie...which is funny b/c He-man looked more like a she-man than anything else with those long golden locks of his. But maybe he named himself He-man to end the confusion and let everyone know he was in fact a man after all of those years of being teased as a teenager.
I mean Jason is out of town, hasn't posted a new blog in days and we are still here commenting on his old blog why he is away! Are we loosers with nothing to do or what??
I'm sorry, I gotta ask. Are loosers the opposite of tighteners?
:(|)
:(|)
# posted by : August 12, 2005 8:08 AM
: August 12, 2005 8:08 AM
If there's any chance that I might stay in the same hotel some day.... I say he can just keep the darned bathrobe.
# posted by : August 12, 2005 8:51 AM
: August 12, 2005 8:51 AM
With the hotel they are staying at in Chicago (The W), I would not be surprised if they placed some sort of protection on your pillow along with your mint...
I would even bet that the bathrobes are made of a silk-like material.
I would even bet that the bathrobes are made of a silk-like material.
# posted by : August 12, 2005 10:46 AM
: August 12, 2005 10:46 AM
this is too funny, apparantly i don't check comments often enough, this is a fun little game goin' on here. well, i'm hoping we get just one more comment out of jason while on vacation, and if its in a bathrobe, well, all the better.
All I know is I've made a vow never to sit on the furniture in the Moran household.
# posted by : August 12, 2005 4:03 PM
: August 12, 2005 4:03 PM
so sammon says "back me up on this dave" and dave is right there in 2 minutes - what are u guys like a cubicle apart at work or something, or do u call each other and say "HEY, check moran's comments..." :)
Your not pissing me off. I just think you are big goofballs.
Pretty funny how topics evolve though.
Poor Kelly, why do you have to be married to such a goofball with such goofball friends!!
Pretty funny how topics evolve though.
Poor Kelly, why do you have to be married to such a goofball with such goofball friends!!
I am speakless. I was going to make some worthwhile comment but there's nothing. I am traumatized. All I can think about is King Kong, little frogs fornicating in leopard print underoos and somewhere in all of this madness my brother...Bobo...is involved. Little Bobo, where did we go wrong? *Dramatic sigh*
Oh! And no! I've never seen my brother in the buff and I never want too either. That's just nasty. He's like one giant speckled egg with swollen eyes and hairy toes. Gross. I'm not really sure why my brother reminds me of an egg but right now he does. He used to be a pineapple head but for now he can be the incredible edible egg.
I was going to leave it at 69 comments but I was afraid of what another might say, so instead I will just talk about myself. Appearantly my site is the place to be according to
quick-mak said...
You driving me out of my mind with your splendid blog! I must have you placed under bookmark!
I think he might be Chinese.
quick-mak said...
You driving me out of my mind with your splendid blog! I must have you placed under bookmark!
I think he might be Chinese.
you know... when Jason posted something called "Guys vs. Girls" I thought maybe he'd get 73 comments... but I thought 63 of them would be directly related to the original post.
This is Jason's blog. I should have known better.
This is Jason's blog. I should have known better.
# posted by : August 13, 2005 11:01 AM
: August 13, 2005 11:01 AM
well, my proudest moment as his younger sister was when I was a toddler and he was teasing me again and I just couldn't take it anymore and I punched him in the face knocking him flat on his back. In fact all of my memories of Jason started with him picking on me, then I gave a light swat to shoo him away and then he'd run off to mommy about how I beat him up again. How annoying!
Oh one of these days you have to ask him to show you with AWESOME dance moves he would show everyone who crossed his path. I think we named it the slick shoes move?
That's just cruel sammon.
Ok, so with all this blog stuff going on, I figure it's about time I get in on the act. I'll make it public when I feel it's ready.
Yeah, I tend to over-complicate things... installing Windows Server 2003, SQL Server 2000, Community Server, buying a domain name, port-forwarding my router, etc etc.
Anyway, to Jason's friends, you all have inspired me more to have a blog than Jason's web of randomness. (no offense Jason).
Ok, so with all this blog stuff going on, I figure it's about time I get in on the act. I'll make it public when I feel it's ready.
Yeah, I tend to over-complicate things... installing Windows Server 2003, SQL Server 2000, Community Server, buying a domain name, port-forwarding my router, etc etc.
Anyway, to Jason's friends, you all have inspired me more to have a blog than Jason's web of randomness. (no offense Jason).
# posted by : August 13, 2005 7:49 PM
: August 13, 2005 7:49 PM
You know what was fun with my brother besides watching Old Yeller every day of our lives, was watching Mary Poppins. The scene where the chimney sweepers hit the firework that was flying their way during their step n time routine and my brother and I would run to the kitchen and get a potato masher and a soup ladle so that we could hit the firework at the same time. Good times. Oh, and I remember playing smurfs alot too.
I really don't have much to say to this, but I wanted to mention that there is a blog for Iron Clad.
Thanks.
Thanks.
Okay Jason comes back home tonight at midnight and there are only 87 comments. We are slacking here.
Just got back in from Chi-town. Holy crap, just when I thought I had things under control, the comments on this blog BLOW UP. I need to review all that was said, but I am very sure that everything said was completely erroneous. Well, except I actually DID gain 20 pounds my first few weeks of college on a grilled cheese sandwich diet.
Oh, my gosh! I was reading all these crazy and hilarious comments and I was almost crying they mad me laugh soooo hard! I don't even know where to start to comment! We had a Great time! I did get really annoyed that Jason HAD to check his blog! Jason got so excited about grilled cheese that he just made me a tasty grilled cheese sandwich (and two for himself).
# posted by : August 15, 2005 9:31 PM
: August 15, 2005 9:31 PM
Wow, I had 1.5 people announce their blog sites in these comments. The Iron Clad men's group has a blog, and "dave d" has announced that he has a blog...but he decided to keep it's exact location a secret for some odd reason.
Also, it's weird that my sister pictured me as a giant egg with hairy toes. When I was in the 4th grade Dan Lemasters wondered what it would be like if I was a giant eyeball. Then he screamed in terror as he imagined it and poked me and shook the eye-goo off of his fingers. "I don't even think you can blink. You'll probably die in a few minutes." Dan Lemasters was weird.
Also, it's weird that my sister pictured me as a giant egg with hairy toes. When I was in the 4th grade Dan Lemasters wondered what it would be like if I was a giant eyeball. Then he screamed in terror as he imagined it and poked me and shook the eye-goo off of his fingers. "I don't even think you can blink. You'll probably die in a few minutes." Dan Lemasters was weird.
Shameless plug for your alumni blog. Shameless. Also, dude, I like how you spelled lude, I'm pretty sure, dewd, that it's spelled lewd. Lastly, I'm pretty sure nobody makes up more stuff about what I have said than you. You stuff-maker-upper.
So, John, I bought a white shirt in Chicago with stripes. Kelly liked it a lot and asked what color the stripes were...and I was almost positive they were orange. She made me look again and I'm like, no way, their not pink, are they? No, not quite. Peach? Almost. Salmon? That's it. Well, actually, not quite salmon, either. Now that I'm thinking about it, it's almost exactly your natural skin color...giving me a white shirt with "Sammon" stripes.
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